A Mix
of Events, Fairs, Recent Council Forum and Views in general
Patience Please!
This is BIG page with lots "O" pics.
Kings Town Association.
(Brading has a Charter from King something or other, it's all in our History page.)
King's Town Association started life as a few local towns people promoting an idea - "Victorian day". To be held near Christmas. Such was the success of this venture we were asked to initiate and promote other ventures such as a Mayday fair, promoting the High St during "Brading Day" day (early summer), shows & lots more. To this end we have the support and active encouragement of our local council and other organisations. So now we have to look seriously at our small group and regularise its banking and organisation. We will be applying for charity status and various fundings and devising a small regular income for running expenses. We are totally independent of all influences other than the requirement and desire to promote our Town of Brading. The secret of our success so far is due to the fact that all members are "self starting" and have considerable skills upon which we can call.
The Rest Of The World: The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks that’s foolish, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. The End
The UK: The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he’s a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed. A professional social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are cold and starving.
The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper; with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food. The British press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so, while others have plenty.
The Labour Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and The Grasshopper Council of GB demonstrate in front of the squirrel’s house. The BBC, interrupting a cultural festival special from Notting Hill with breaking news, broadcasts a multi cultural choir singing “We Shall Overcome”. Labour representative rants on television during an interview that the squirrel got rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his “fair share” and increases the charge for squirrels to enter inner London . In response to pressure from the EU, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The squirrel’s taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the grasshopper did not want to work. The grasshopper is provided with a council house, financial aid to furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be socially mobile. The squirrel’s food is seized and re distributed to the more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper. Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start building a new home.
The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get to Britain as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On arrival they tried to blow up the airport because of Britain’s apparent love of dogs.
The cats had been arrested for the international offence of hijacking and attempted bombing but were immediately released because the police fed them pilchards instead of salmon whilst in custody. Initial moves to then return them to their own country were abandoned because it was feared they would face death by the mice. The cats devise and start a scam to obtain money from people’s credit cards. A Panorama special shows the grasshopper finishing up the last of the squirrel’s food, though spring is still months away, while the council house he is in, crumbles around him because he hasn’t bothered to maintain the house. He is shown to be taking drugs. Inadequate government funding is blamed for the grasshopper’s drug ‘illness’.
The grasshopper gets arrested for stabbing an old dog during a burglary to get money for his drugs habit. He is imprisoned but released immediately because he has been in custody for a few weeks. He is placed in the care of the probation service to monitor and supervise him. Within a few weeks he has killed a guinea pig in a botched robbery. A commission of enquiry, that will eventually cost £10,000,000 and state the obvious, is set up.
Additional money is put into funding a drug rehabilitation scheme for grasshoppers and legal aid for lawyers representing asylum seekers is increased.
The asylum-seeking cats seek recompense in the British courts for their treatment since arrival in UK They are praised by the government for enriching Britain’s multicultural diversity and dogs are criticised by the government for failing to befriend the cats.
The grasshopper dies of a drug overdose. The usual sections of the press blame it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity and his traumatic experience of prison. They call for the resignation of a minister. The cats are paid a million pounds each because their rights were infringed when the government failed to inform them there were mice in the United Kingdom The dogs and the victims of the hijacking, the bombing, the burglaries and robberies have to pay an additional percentage on their credit cards to cover losses, their taxes are increased to pay for law and order and they are told that they will have to work beyond 65 because of a shortfall in government funds.
The squirrel? He moved to France ..
European English Language. Year Convergence Plan
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for Improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-In plan that should be completed by April! 2010 and would become known as "Euro-English".
Year 1. "s" will replace the soft "c." Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants Jump with Joy. The hard "c" will be dropped In favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
Year 2. There will be growing publik enthusiasm In the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f." This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
Year 3. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letter which have always ben a deterent to akurate spellng. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
Year 4. By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" wiz "v."
Year 5. During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontainlng"ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vll hav a rell senslbl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or diflkultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finall kum tru.
Zen ve vil rul ze vorld!!!
Sky! For those people who are tired of the service that "Sky" gives. It is possible to get a free card by cancelling one's account with Sky and dialing:- 08702438000. This card enables the viewer to receive:- BBCs 1/2. channels 4 & 5 TCM (films) Sky news & a few other channels. I have found Messrs D & H Electronics of Bembridge, tel. 01983 872726 very helpful in this and other matters.
Please Note:- Any comments expressed by me on this page are a product of genuinely held beliefs and observations and not motivated by any malice. They are simply an expression of my opinion and not necessarily an assertion of fact. Russ Lea
We welcome Brading oriented inclusions from all, especially "ex pats".
